think life have been totally sucky the past one or two weeks. bleh.
i feel tired when i am in a bad mood, yet i have to show a happy, smiling face to people bcos i dont want them to think i am not happy or sthg.
dont really see the point in that. neither is it me to put up a face that doesnt show my mood or hides my feelings. its not that i dont try to be cheerful even if im sad. its just that i cant help it, ive tried many times before. really tiring-
but maybe, trying to smile for friends is worth it.
lol. *thinks of jinci scolding me for showing her a black face with i go out with her
ok i have no idea what im talking about. haha. but ohwells, not like people appreciate it anyway. if i were somebody else, i would probably think jh is a petty and moodswingy person. maybe i am towards some matters. or maybe its just the pms problem. i realise my pms problem is getting more serious haha.
so, more reflection and praying for me..
in the meantime, SORRY! to all the people i showed a black face to and all the snappy tones i had esp last wk. esp jinci haha. sorry dear ): i still love you lol.
and i think my mum is probably the nicest person on earth. (ok thats subjective but i dont care) She's just always there, somehow, when im unhappy, when im upset, or when im happy or not.. she's always there to try to help me solve my problems no matter how busy she is. Just like yesterday, taking out so much of her busy time just to go out with me. (though she gave the excuse of wanting to buy dining utensils but she cud easily go somewhere near like parkway to get them) listening to my complaints about everything, forgiving me when im rude to her.. spending tons on me and still think its worth it. rmbr her taking out a card i gave her when i was 7 years old, saying a 'sorry mummy' in a short note that i slipped under the door into her room. i cant believe she kept it for 10 whole years. and i cant never forget the incident where she came all e way back home from vj just to pass the house keys cos she didnt want me to sit outside for 2 hours (despite telling her ten times not to do that). and the incident when she went walking around so many money changers with me just to find the best bargain.. and after that she told me, 'there, now you have an extra $2. can let you buy one extra choc bar!' and i never said it but i felt like crying after she said that. i wish.. i can stay by her side forever and ever. that time will stand still and things will never change.
what an emo post, but something ive been wanting to post for a long time. haha. on a random note, today is somebody's birthday! haha. and we are going sakae to celebrate sadlife's bday later.
happy birthday wenjun! (:
